The formula for the perfect butt, regeneration as an alternative to stem cells and how to engage a man.

Rear Admirable
David Holmes, a psychologist at Manchester Metropolitan University, insists that a good bum is key to attractiveness, and he’s devised a formula that describes the ideal female buttocks. According to Holmes, maximizing (S + C) x (B + F)/T - V makes for gluteal greatness. S is overall shape of the bottom, C is circularity (how spherical the butt is), B is resilience to bouncing and wobbling, F is touch firmness, T is skin texture and V is the vertical ratio or “pertness.” Holmes added that a hip to waist ratio—waist size divided by hip size—of 0.7 is ideal for framing a woman’s posterior.

Holmes found the formula by getting 2,000 British women to rate their own bottoms. In the shape category, those with a “trodden doughnut” got only one point, whereas those with a “small peach” scored the maximum five points. After compiling all the factors, a total of 80 points was labeled “perfection,” whereas booties earning fewer than zero points were told to “stay indoors.” But don’t fear, saggy bottom girls, Holmes writes, “Failing all else, confidence and good conversation can sometimes distract attention, if not compensate for a ‘bum deal’ in the buttock lottery.”

Talkin’ ‘Bout Regeneration
Jesus said, “And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee,” (Matthew 5:30). But what good will that do…if you can regrow your hand? Scientists are now considering organ regeneration as an alternative to stem cell therapy. Plenty of species can regrow their body parts: Fish and amphibians can sometimes regenerate their limbs, tails, jaws, intestines, spinal cords and parts of their eyes and hearts; deer can regrow their antlers; even mammals can regenerate their livers. These animals have a mechanism by which cells at the site of a wound can revert to an immature state, a la stem cells. If we can figure out how to express the genes that control that process, the more patient of us can avoid rushing to emergency rooms with severed fingers on ice.
(source: The New York Times)

What Dreams May Come
Stay away from the light! Or don’t. A new study has found a biological basis for near death experience. According to the findings, what might be perceived as stepping out of the body or seeing a white light or feeling an extreme sense of calm might just be the REM sleep state intruding on wakefulness. Researchers compared 55 people who’d had near-death experiences to 55 who hadn’t, determining that 60% of those who’d walked away from the light also reported experiencing the REM state while they were awake. Significantly fewer people who had not had such experiences reported the same thing happening. The researchers are still hesitant to refer to near-death experiences as “dreaming while awake.”
(source: BBC)

Pants on Fire
Sure, we all like to think of ourselves as honest, but a new study in the Journal of Consumer Research shows that we’re not quite the truth-tellers we believe ourselves to be. In fact, when we talk to strangers, we’re more likely to tell the truth, but when we talk to coworkers or friends, we lie like rugs. The study, which examined the whens and whys of lying, found that we generally twist the facts in order to preserve our own self-image and self-worth. Most commonly, people lie about what they pay for goods and services, saying they coughed up less money than they actually did so as not to be viewed as a sucker. Oh, this old war? No big deal. It’s costing us, like, a couple billion dollars, or something.
(source: University of Chicago Press Journals)

I’m With the Band
Why tie a knot around your finger to remember something when you have a gold band there already? A new study shows that people who don’t wear wedding rings are more likely to neglect children than people who do. University of Alberta social psychologist Andrew Harrell also notes that young attractive people who don’t wear wedding rings are the most neglectful group. Experimenters covertly observed 862 caretaker/children combinations in 14 supermarkets in Edmonton, noting how frequently caretakers lost sight of their charges.

“It is our belief that an interest in establishing social, sexual or emotional ties outside of marriage may have the inadvertent consequence of diminishing attentiveness to children,” Harrell said, citing research showing a correlation between ring-wearing and emotional commitment to marriage. “And it’s not surprising that this distraction occurs even in a mundane setting like a supermarket, which is more than a place to purchase bananas and cereal. It can also be a place for social encounters and maybe even a romantic rendezvous.”

Hey there, you presumably single hot young thing, why don’t you give the kid some Cookie Crisp and meet me in the frozen foods aisle? Rarr.
(source: University of Alberta)

The 30 Second First Impression
Listen up ladies. The key question that will open the door to the intellectual relationship of your dreams is: What’s your favorite pizza topping? That was the chat-up question asked by the top-rated woman in University of Hertfordshire professor Richard Wiseman‘s study on speed dating. During an elaborate experiment where participants went on a total of 10 dates each, the study found that women make up their minds about men more quickly than men do about women: 45% of the ladies decided within 30 seconds whether a potential suitor was boyfriend material, whereas only 22% of men made a similar conclusion in half a minute. While the most successful daters, such as pizza girl, asked questions that encouraged the date to talk about him or herself in an unusual way, the least successful used trite lines such as, “Do you come here often?” or unsubtle attempts to impress such as, “I have a Ph.D. in computing.” Computing? What nimble fingers you must have.
(source: Scotsman)

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Originally published April 17, 2006


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